Yesterday, I had my first performance with "my" band, the Scene of the Crime Rovers. "We're" a noise-punk, free-form marching band (drums, cymbals, flutes, horns, etc.) and I am in the color guard. For those of you not in the know, that means that I twirl a flag. The reason for the quotes around the first-person words is that I am not sure if I really feel like I am in the band. I have gone to two practices and one performance. And each time, I really struggled.
I LOVE the Scene of the Crime Rovers. It is really cool to see some folks all dressed up and marching in downtown Durham. If you have never seen "us," you should make every effort to get out and see one of "our" gigs. Your kids will love it, too. Yesterday, we performed at the grand opening of the Farmers Market Pavilion in downtown Durham. It was also the official opening of the Farmers Market season. YEAH!!!
But, I am not sure if I'm cut out to be a flag twirler. The idea of the performance was great, but the execution was a huge struggle for me. My mind does not work in a free-form way. I like things to be black/white or right/wrong. I like structure and rules. I also feel like I need to learn something about flag-twirling before I can just "do whatever" which is the instruction I had been given. Yesterday, I hit another flag twirler twice with my flag and I bonked myself in the head (only once though which is much better than how I've done in practice).
The most positive aspect of this experience is getting me out of my comfort zone. It's hard to twirl a flag standing in front of other people... even just in front of the other band members. The older I get, the more shy and socially anxious I feel. And it's also hard for me to just "do whatever" given that my brain just doesn't function like that. Because of this, I know that I must keep this up and continue trying.
If anyone wants to teach me some tips on flag twirling, please do. I would love the help. My thought was that being in the color guard would allow me to live out my Busby Berkeley fantasies. Va va va voom!
UPDATE: Christa took some pictures.